Tag Archives: Joke of the Day

My mother taught me GENETICS.
“You’re just like your father.” read more

My mother taught me about RECEIVING
“You are going to get it from your father when he gets home!”

My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.” read more

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times, don’t exaggerate!”

My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brought you into this world and I can take you out.” read more

My father taught me IRONY.
“Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about.”

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.” read more

My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!” read more

Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye was admitted to Oxford University and was now in his first year of residence there.

His clan was very excited that one of their own had made it into the upper class of education, but were concerned how he’d do in “that strange land.” read more

This holiday season, if you decide to have a few drinks at various events, don’t drive – take a cab. But not literally. read more

An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates.

St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, you’re an engineer — you’re in the wrong place.”

So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in.

Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. read more

Bubba & Earl were in the local bar enjoying a beer when the decided to get in on the weekly charity raffle.

They bought five tickets each at a dollar a pop.

The following week, when the raffle was drawn, each had won a prize. read more

A man walks pass a beggar on the corner of the street where he works.

The beggar holds out his one hand and the man drops a coin into his hand. read more