Joke of the Day

A man and an ostrich walk into a restaurant. The waitress asks, “What will it be?”
The man replied “a burger and a coke.” “And you?” “I’ll have the same,” the ostrich replies. They finish their meal and pay. “That will be $4.50,” The man reached into his pocket and pulled out the exact amount. They do this every day till Fri.
“The usual?” she asked. “No, today is Friday. I’ll have steak and a coke.”
“Me too.” says the ostrich. They finish and pay. “That will be $10.95”
The man reached in and pulls out the exact amount again just like all week.
The waitress was dumb-founded. “How is it that you always have the exact amount?”
“Well,” says the man. “I was cleaning my attic and I found a dusty lamp. I rubbed it and a genie appeared.” Wow!” said the waitress. “What did you wish for?”
“I asked that when I needed to pay for something, the exact amount would appear in my pocket.” “Amazing! Most people would ask for a million dollars. But what’s with the ostrich?” “Well,” said the man. “I also asked for a chick with long legs.”

No Cops on Campus!

Most of us have seen the Occupy UC Berkeley protest, where the Police just walked up to the seated innocent students & showered them, unprovoked, with pepper spray. That’s the one the drive by media showed us. Below is the raw video showing the run up to the event. Clearly, these dolts were being led & clearly the police had little choice. I think they showed a lot more patience than I would have.

The video is a bit long, but stick with it. The pictures tell a much different story than the media has or ever will.

One Question: Why is there no effort to find & interview the leader of these chanting buffoons? Is he a student or, as I suspect, some outside agitator sent in to stir the dimwited student body to a frenzy in order to achieve the desired end, which was of course, the claim of police abuse.

Joke of the Day

Another Classic!

It has been raining hard in the Mississippi Valley, and the rising river begins to threaten all manner of private homes, including that of the local Reverend.

With water coming into the ground floor, a rowboat with police comes by, and the officer shouts, “Reverend, let us evacuate you! The water level is getting dangerous.”

The Reverend replies, “No thank you, I am a righteous man, who trusts in the Almighty, and I am confident he will deliver me.” Three hours go by, and the rains intensify, at which point the Reverend is forced up to the second floor of his house. A second police rowboat comes by, and the officer shouts, “Reverend, let us evacuate you! The water level is getting dangerous.”

The Reverend replies, “No thank you, I am a righteous man, who trusts in the Almighty, and I am confident he will deliver me.”

The rain does not stop, and the Reverend is forced up onto the roof of his house. A helicopter flies over, and the officer shouts down, “Reverend, grab the rope and we’ll pull you up! You’re in terrible danger!”

The Reverend replies, “No thank you, I am a righteous man, who trusts in the Almighty, and I am confident he will deliver me.”
The deluge continues, and the Reverend is swept off the roof, carried away in the current and drowns. He goes up to heaven, and at the Pearly Gates he is admitted, and comes before the Divine Presence.

The Reverend asks, “Dear Lord, I don’t understand. I’ve been a righteous observant person my whole life, and depended on you to save me in my hour of need. Where were you?”

And the Lord answered, “I sent two boats and a helicopter, what more did you want?”

We Need Some Rural Council(ing)

While we out mowing the lawn or working on our tans the President quietly & with no fanfare signed Executive order 13575.

President Obama signed his 86th executive order (13575) on June 9, which established the White House Rural Council (WHRC). According to The Blaze, the Executive Order seems to be in line with the United Nations radical
Agenda 21, as it is designed “to begin taking control over almost all aspects of the lives of 16 percent of the American people.”

In case you are unaware, the U.N.’s Agenda 21 proposes a global regime that will monitor, oversee, and strictly regulate our planet’s oceans, lakes, streams, rivers, aquifers, seabeds, coastlands, wetlands, forests, jungles, grasslands, farmland, deserts, tundra, and mountains.
It even has a whole section on regulating and “protecting” the atmosphere. It proposes plans for cities, towns, suburbs, villages, and rural areas. It envisions a global scheme for healthcare, education, nutrition, agriculture, labor, production, and consumption — in short, everything; there is nothing on, in, over, or under the Earth that doesn’t fall within the purview of some part of Agenda 21. Sounds great, right?

The mission and function of the WHRC (White House Rural Council), according to the Executive Order, is as follows: “The Council shall work across executive departments, agencies, and offices to coordinate development of policy recommendations to promote economic prosperity and quality of life in rural America, and shall coordinate my Administration’s engagement with rural communities.”

Why would they need to further engage with rural communities? I don’t hear a clamoring for that.

Executive Order 13575 asserts that the WHRC will “coordinate Federal efforts
directed toward the growth and development of geographic regions that encompass both urban and rural areas, and identify and facilitate rural economic opportunities associated with energy development, outdoor recreation, and other conservation-related activities.”

A full 25 governmental departments are involved with the “Rural Council”.

The Blaze reported, “It appears that not a single department in the federal government has been excluded from the White House Rural Council, and the wild card option in number 25 gives the president and the agricultural secretary the option to designate anyone to serve on this powerful council.”

Among the more notable members of the council are, Timothy Geithner (Treasury), Robert Gates (Defense), Eric Holder (Justice) (In case someone needs extra guns, I guess), Janet Napolitano (Homeland Security), Melody Barnes (Domestic Policy) & Valerie Jarrett (Public Engagement and Intergovernmental Affairs).

Interestingly, Valerie Jarrett served as a member on the board of the Local Initiatives Support Coalition (LISC), which uses the language of Agenda 21 and ICLEI
[International Council for Local Environmental Initiatives] as their webpage descriptively explains the organization’s work to build “sustainable communities”.

Melody Barnes is the former Vice President of the George Soros-funded Center for American Progress. Soros is a prime advocate of Agenda 21 and in fact, his Open Society provided $2,147,415 to ICLEI.

As with everything else the regime does, I’m sure this is all just coincidental.

Once again; move along, nothing to see here!

Attribution: The Blaze, Cowboy Byte

Occupy a Brain

From IBD:

Student Loans: It’s no wonder the public increasingly dislikes the Occupy crowd. Among their brilliant ideas is a campaign to encourage pampered students to default on college loans. Yeah, that’ll win over Middle America.

The left-wing Huffington Post quoted New York University professor Andrew Ross as telling the Occupy crowd in New York recently about the “harrowing personal testimony” and the “suffering and humiliation of people who believe their debts will be unpayable in their lifetime.”

The horror!

So Ross and a variety of other Occupy miscreants have started up something called the Occupy Student Debt campaign, which hopes to get 1 million students to default on their college loans. “Student loan debt,” they say, “is poisoning the pursuit of higher education.”

Oh, and they also want all public colleges to be free, all existing debt forgiven, and interest-free education loans. Apparently, colleges have given up trying to impart wisdom, prudence or maturity on their students. These kids, and the brain-dead professors backing them, don’t know the first thing about student debt.

First, about a third of students don’t borrow any money for college. And the average debt per borrower is just $22,000 for those attending public four-year colleges and $28,000 for those going to private colleges, according to the College Board.

What’s more, these figures are up only 11%, after inflation, over the past decade. None of this suggests a student debt crisis.

And given that graduates can expect to earn $22,000 more each year than those with only a high school diploma, the average borrower will still come out well ahead after a few years.

It’s true that some graduates wind up with a mountain of debt — mostly kids who went to elite private schools. But are we really supposed to believe that these kids were smart enough to graduate from such colleges but too dumb to understand how much it would cost? In any case, no one put a gun to their heads and forced them to sign the loan documents.

The Occupiers also whine about the “unjust system” of “predatory loans,” overlooking the fact that just 5% of the loans last year were made by private companies. Almost all the rest came through federal loan programs.

They also complain about rising college costs, but blame the wrong villain. It’s not predatory lenders who are driving up college costs, it’s the massive effort on the part of government to shield students from the true cost of a college education — through the ever-increasing number of grants, tax breaks, subsidized loans and direct spending.

In just the past decade, college financial aid has climbed an astonishing 139%, and now accounts for more than half of all college costs, according to the College Board. As any Economics 101 student knows, government subsidies only serve to fuel inflation by increasing demand while giving suppliers the freedom to jack up prices.

So the solution to college costs isn’t to attack bankers, but call for cutbacks on the scale of all this financial aid.

And, finally, the Occupy crowd complains that too many students can’t find jobs to pay off their debt. With unemployment still topping 9% and more than 25 million Americans unable to find full-time jobs, they may have a point there.

But as we’ve long argued in this space, the solution to this particular problem is to fire President Obama, whose policies have produced the worst economic recovery since the Great Depression.

In the end, what these students want is simply to foist still more college costs onto everyone else, while keeping all the benefits of a college degree to themselves. These people aren’t progressives. They’re just spoiled brats.

Joke of the Day

A fire starts inside a chemical plant and the alarm goes out to fire departments miles around. After crews have been fighting the fire for over an hour, the chemical company president approached the fire chief and said, “All of our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved! I will give $100,000 to the engine company that brings them out safely!”

The crews try, but no one can get through. Then another fire truck, filled with a volunteer fire company of men over 65, comes roaring down the road and drives straight into the middle of the inferno. The other men watch unbelieving as the old timers hop off of their ancient rig and heroically extinguish the fire, saving the secret formulas.

The company president walks over to reward the volunteers. “What do you guys plan to do with the money?” the president asks the group.

The firetruck driver looks him right in the eye and answers, “Well, the first thing we’re going to do is fix the f**king brakes on that truck.”

10 Tenets of Conservatism

by: the Common Constitutionalist

There is a list of ten statements beginning with “You cannot …” that are popularly attributed to Honest Abe Lincoln.

The 10 “Cannots” are simple in their brilliance.

They sound like statements Lincoln would have penned and are frequently quoted and attributed to him.

However, Lincoln didn’t write them. They were authored in 1916 by the Rev. William J. H. Boetcker, a Presbyterian clergyman and pamphlet writer.

In 1942 the Committee for Constitutional Government, a lobby backed by the newspaper publisher Frank Gannett, distributed hundreds of thousands of copies of a leaflet with an authentic Lincoln quote on one side entitled, “Lincoln on Limitations.” On the reverse was a list of Boetcker’s maxims, properly attributed in a footnote.

Somehow, Boetker’s words came to be ascribed to Lincoln. In 1949 an Ohio congresswoman, Frances P. Bolton, read them as Lincoln’s into the Congressional Record. Look magazine reprinted them with the suggestion that “Its about time for the country to remember.”

Attempting to correct the record, Rep. Stephen M. Young inserted into the Congressional Record, in 1950, an article from Harper’s magazine, written by a Lincoln scholar, Albert A. Wolman, listing most of the ”Ten Cannots” and other material falsely attributed to Lincoln.

The 10 Cannots:

1)You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.

2)You cannot help small men by tearing down big men.

3)You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.

4)You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.

5)You cannot help the poor man by destroying the rich.

6)You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than your income.

7)You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.

8)You cannot establish security on borrowed money.

9)You cannot build character and courage by taking away men’s initiative and independence.

10)You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves.

Maybe this should be the new “Contract with America”?