A sailor meets a pirate in a bar, and take turns boasting of their adventures on the high seas. The sailor notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, hook, and an eyepatch.
The sailor asks “So, how did ye end up with the peg-leg?”
The pirate replies “We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as me men were pulling me out a shark bit me leg off.”
“Well…”, replied the pirate, “While me men and I were plundering in the middle east, I was caught stealing from a merchant and the punishment for theft in the middle east is the loss of the hand that steals”
“Incredible!” remarked the sailor. “How did ye get the eyepatch”?
“A sea gull dropping fell into me eye.”, replied the pirate.
“You lost your eye to a sea gull dropping?” the sailor asked incredulously.
“Well…”, said the pirate, “..it was me first day with the hook.”