The devil whispered to me, “I’m coming for you.”
I whispered back, “Bring pizza.”
Me: (sobbing my heart out, eyes were swollen, nose red) … I can’t see you anymore. I am not going to let you hurt me like this again!
Trainer: It was a sit-up. You did one sit-up.
Having plans sounds like a good idea, until you have to put on clothes and leave the house.
It’s weird being the same age as old people.
When I was a kid I wanted to be older … this is not what I expected.
Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.
Chocolate is God’s way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby.
It’s probably my age that tricks people into thinking I’m an adult.