Things You Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery
– Better save that. We’ll need it for the autopsy.
– Someone call the janitor – we’re going to need a mop.
– Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness!
– Spot! Spot! Come back with that! Bad Dog!
– Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what’s that?
– Hand me that…uh…that…uh…..thingie.
– Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.
– Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
– Darn, there go the lights again…
– You know, there’s big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy’s got two of them.
– Could you stop that thing from beating; it’s throwing my concentration off.
– What do you mean he wasn’t in for a sex change…!
– Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
– This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
– Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donor card?
– Don’t worry; I think it’s sharp enough.
– What do you mean “You want a divorce”