After ten years, the wife starts to think their kid looks kinda strange, so she decides to do a DNA test. She finds out that the child is actually from a completely different set of parents.
God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel,found him, resting on the seventh day.
He inquired, “Where have you been?”
God smiled deeply and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, “Look, Michael … Look what I’ve made.”
Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, “What is it?”
“It’s a planet,” replied God, and I’ve put life on it … I’m going to call it Earth and it’s going to be a place to test Balance.”
There were three men standing at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter came out to meet them and asked, “What would you like to hear your relatives and friends say at your funeral?”
A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 in the morning.
Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed. Just then, his wife sleepily sat up and said, “Mike, dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the next block and get me some aspirin? I’ve got a splitting headache.”