The old farm lady had lived a long, fruitful life, but she was finally on her death bed.
Two old men, close to their last days, decide to have a last night on the town. After a few drinks, they end up at the local brothel.
The madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, “Go up to the first two bedrooms and put an inflated doll in each bed.”
“These two are so old and drunk, I’m not wasting two of my girls on them. They won’t know the difference.”
A hunter was rushed into the emergency room with a bear trap clamped onto his testicles. As the horrified doctor was examining him, he said “Man, how did this happen?”
An incompetent counterfeiter spent all day making his funny money. At the end of the day he realizes he spent all his time making $15 bills.
Which side of the fence?
If you ever wondered which side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!
If a conservative doesn’t like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
If a liberal doesn’t like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.