Joke of the Day

A local priest and a pastor were fishing on the side of the road. They thoughtfully made a sign saying, “The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it’s too late!” and showed it to each passing car.

One driver who drove by didn’t appreciate the sign and shouted at them, “Leave us alone, you religious nuts!”

All of a sudden they heard a big splash, looked at each other, and the priest said to the pastor, “You think maybe we should have just said ‘Bridge Out’ instead?”

Just Give Me More Time

by: the Common Constitutionalist

Looking at an electoral map or a red/blue state map one will notice virtually all of New England is blue. New Hampshire is currently purple but, in November, will return to its natural red hue. We in New Hampshire tend to buck the blue state monopoly shared by the rest of the New England states.

I write today, not of electoral maps or red and blue states, but of the saga of the Boston Red Sox (even if you’re not a sports fan, just continue reading).

Anyone who follows baseball knows of the utter collapse of the Red Sox beginning at the end of the 2011 season.

I am not a Red Sox fan. Truth be told, I am not a baseball fan. The game is slow and arduous. If it were full-contact, I might watch.

But fans of New England sports teams are a spoiled bunch. Championships have been the norm for the last decade for every major league team. Winning is the only thing up here and we have grown accustomed to that. Anything less is a disappointment. The Celtics, the Red Sox, Bruins, and of course, the Patriots.

 New England sports talk radio is big business and there is plenty to speak of. For the past year, the discussions have centered around the Red Sox. The scandals regarding the pitchers being fat and out of shape, not practicing and drinking beer in the dugout.

Terry Francona, the very successful Sox manager, who led them to 2 World Series titles was summarily dismissed. What superstar did they choose to head up one of sports top franchises? A washed up old has been, Bobby Valentine. He was supposed to come in and inject some discipline into the team and right a rudderless ship. So it was said.

Fans had high hopes for the Sox. The manager said all the right things.

When things went bad, as they did in short order (or should I say, remained bad), the manager stated that it could still be turned around. That he just needed more time.

The fans had faith, that despite witnessing loss after painful loss, things could still magically turn around. Some were calling to replace the manager immediately, but plenty still held out hope that things would change and had a wait and see attitude.

Well, most Red Sox fans have come to the end of their respective ropes. Bobby Valentine is just not cutting it. He has to go. At the end of the fast approaching, bitter end to the season, the manager will be out. So will many of the players, who are as much to blame as he.

The ultra-left wing liberals of the New England states have neither the stomach or endless patience for such a loser. Bobby Valentine will not get a second chance. The fans demand a winner.

Such is the dichotomy of sports and politics in New England.

When one of our beloved sports franchises is suffering, the cause of that suffering must go, and sooner than later.

In the grand scheme of things, sports is rather trivial, yet it appears to trump all other trials we are experiencing.

New England liberals seem to care more about the Red Sox than they do about the country. They are quick to throw out a bum like Valentine and disregard him as he asked for more time, but somehow, when our beloved president does the same, they accept it.

I don’t recall Bobby Valentine ever stating he should be fired if he couldn’t fix the Sox problems, but I sure remember Obama stating just that.

The Ayes Have It

This just in. 

Most people paying even scant attention know the democrats revealed who they really are as a party, as they expelled any mention of God from the party platform, as well as officially throwing Israel under the bus.

Knowing them as I and other informed conservatives do, they were certain this was just a minor adjustment to their overall, radical platform.

They were clearly taken by surprise at the backlash they received and the firestorm it caused.

They sent out old party hacks, such as Dick Turbin, not to defend the decision, but to dodge and deflect. It didn’t work.

I just witnessed the floor vote at the convention to reinsert God back into the platform. I’m not sure it was also for the Israel flap, but I assume so.

The man at the podium shouted, “All in Favor, say Aye!” Many shouted in the affirmative. He then shouted, “All opposed, say no!” Just as many as the ayes. He then repeated himself, with the same outcome. He tried a third time with the same results.

At this point he had the option to take a floor vote but declined. After some quick whispers to a colleague, he declared, “The ayes have it, measured passed.” Boos then resounded over the floor of the hall.

Watching the man squirming up there at the podium was almost sad. He clearly did not want to be put in this position.

I’m betting, the democrat campaign damage control experts set this up telling this poor sap, whatever happens, the ayes will prevail. There would be no floor vote. They could not take the chance of the no votes winning out.

Now that’s entertainment.

The ‘Hulk’ Protein

If you hate the idea of working out in a gym to look toned and muscle-bound, then this could be the news you have been waiting for.

Scientists in Australia believe they have found one of the molecular keys to a protein that promotes weight and muscle mass gain – without any exercise involved.

Researchers have found that by blocking the function of Grb10 – nicknamed the ‘Hulk’ protein – while mice were in the womb, they were considerably stronger and more muscular at birth than normal mice.

The study, published in the September issue of the respected FASEB Journal, has important implications for a wide range of conditions such as muscular dystrophy, Type 2 diabetes, and problems produced by muscle inflammation.

Grb10 seems to have a significant role in promoting muscle growth without any change in activity, diet, or adverse health effects, according to researchers.

“By identifying a novel mechanism regulating muscle development, our work has revealed potential new strategies to increase muscle mass”, said Lowenna J. Holt from the Diabetes and Obesity Research Program at the Garvan Institute of Medical Research in Sydney.

Holt and her colleagues compared two groups of mice. One with the Grb10 gene and the other where it was blocked.

Researchers examined the properties of the muscles in both adult and newborn mice and discovered that the increase caused by the loss of Grb10 had mainly occurred during prenatal development.

These results suggested that it may in future be possible to alter muscle growth and help faster healing, as the processes involved in muscle regeneration and repair are similar to

Um…Gross

those for the initial formation of muscle.

But Dr Gerald Weissmann, editor-in-chief of The FASEB Journal, warned: “Don’t turn in your gym membership just yet.  If you want big muscles, the classic prescription still applies: lift heavy things, eat and sleep right, and have your hormones checked.”

‘”But this study shows that when we understand the basic science of how muscle fibers grow and multiply, we will be able to lift the burden – literally – of muscle disease for many of our patients.”

Attribution: Mail Online

Papers Please

Article One

by: Gary DeMar

You can tell a lot by the motives of someone by looking at how consistent they are. In order to get into the Democratic National Convention in Charlotte, NC, you will need an ID. Why can’t Democrat voters be trusted to enter a convention that’s for Democrats? Why would they lie about who they are?

A Democrat official will most likely say that IDs are necessary because of party crashers. Maybe some Republicans, Libertarians, or Independents will try to come in and disrupt the convention. This is a very good argument for the necessity of IDs for the convention. But it leaves a couple of things unanswered.

First, isn’t it a hardship on some people to get an ID? Isn’t this a standard argument sued by Liberals on why it’s unconstitutional improper to ask for an ID at the voting booth? If it’s not a hardship in one place (the convention), then it’s not a hardship in another place (the voting booth).

Second, the very nature of an election is to get your guy elected. Some people are unscrupulous in that they will do anything to ensure their candidate wins. This will mean sabotaging an election by voting multiple times or using the names and addresses of dead people to flood the ballot box with extra votes.

“An ‘anti-voter fraud’ group says it has discovered 30,000 dead folks registered to vote across North Carolina. The group collected the names by comparing death records from the past decade to voter rolls; it says the figure would have been bigger had the group had access to death records in neighboring states.”

While not all these dead voters’ names are implicated in voter fraud, it’s not beyond the realm of possibilities that they could be. Without a proper ID, how would anyone know if a person was using a deceased registered voter as a way to boost the number of votes for one political party over the other? They wouldn’t.

The following is from the Charlotte Observer:

“Mainly, what we’re concerned about is the potential [for fraud],” said project director Jay DeLancy. “Since there is no voter ID law in North Carolina, anybody can walk in and claim to be anyone else.”

Liberals are so intent on blocking voter ID requirements because they know that their fellow-liberals are some of the biggest voter-cheats. They wouldn’t cash a check given to them by someone claiming to be the person the check is made out to, but they’re willing to look the other way for the potential of voter fraud in order put people in office who write checks to keep the wealth distributors in office.

Article Two

by:  at the Blaze

TheBlaze’s Benny Johnson contributed to this post.

While most Americans — those who believe they are not better off now than they were four years ago — would likely say that the most important issue to them this election season is the economy, others have different priorities in mind. During the Monday festivities at the Democratic National Convention in Charlotte, North Carolina, TheBlaze tracked down attendees to find out what concerns them most in campaign 2012. For one delegate, who claimed she has also served as a local precinct chair in Texas, that pressing matter is “voter freedom” and “voter equity,” which she asserts Americans are being stripped — even “raped” — of.

According to the delegate, being required to present a photo ID at the polling stations creates voter inequity and causes certain people to lose “part of their freedom” and their all-American, “constitutional right” to vote — that, to her, is akin to rape.

While being required to present an ID would not actually strip someone of his or her “right” to vote, the delegate pressed on.

“It’s like raping somebody,” she stated plainly before agreeing that a utility bill is more than sufficient proof of identification to present at the voting booth.

“It‘s the most awful thing I’ve ever seen.”

When TheBlaze reminded the delegate that attendees of the Democratic National Convention, particularly members of the press, are required to present their IDs not once, not twice, but three times in order to simply enter the convention hall, she seemed to change her tune.

Ironically, she told TheBlaze that as someone who has served in the military, showing ID “comes natural” to her and that if she were asked to present her identification “ten times” at the Democratic Convention, she‘d be more than willing to do so because there it’s about “security” and “that’s too crucial.”

It should perhaps be noted that State ID cards range in price from $5 to $26.50 depending on the state of issue. Most states seem to charge roughly $10 and in many instances it is free for people over the age of 60.

Your Keys are Hot!

If you’re a regular reader, you know I don’t write about or publish anything having to do with computers or tech, other than something new or what I think is cool. I came across this and decided I can’t be the only dope out there that doesn’t know this stuff. Below is a list of common keyboard hotkeys or shortcuts, broken out into categories.  They will work with virtually any web browser.

Basic Navigation Hotkeys

Keyboard Shortcut Action
F5 Refresh
Ctrl + F5 Refresh and reset the browser cache for the current page.
Alt + Left Arrow Back
Alt + Right Arrow Forward
Alt + Home Return to Homepage
Escape Stop
F6 Select the address bar (Alt+D and Ctrl+L also works here)
F11 Fullscreen mode, exit fullscreen mode
Home Scroll to top of page
End Scroll to bottom of page
Spacebar Scroll down
Shift+ Spacebar Scroll up
Page Down / Up Scroll down / up
Ctrl + C Copy selected text
Ctrl + X Cut (copy and delete original) text
Ctrl + V Paste copied text

 

Advanced Navigation Shortcut Keys

Keyboard Shortcut Action
Ctrl + D Bookmark current page
F1 Open a mostly useless help page
F3 Perform a text search on the current page, find next text result
Shift + F3 Find previous text search results
Ctrl + F Perform a text search on the current page
Ctrl + G Find next text result
Ctrl + Shift + G Find previous text result
Ctrl + H Open browsing history
Ctrl + J Open downloads folder and/or history
Ctrl + O Open a local file in the browser
Ctrl + S Download and save current page
Ctrl + P Print current page
Ctrl + E Select the search box or omnibar. (Ctrl + K also works)
Ctrl + Shift + Del Opens up the clear browser history dialog or settings
Alt + Enter Open search in a new tab
Ctrl + Enter Open search term as a website
F12 Open developer tools or Firebug
Ctrl + U View source
Alt + F Makes the menu bar appear (if hidden)

All About Tabs

Keyboard Shortcut Action
Ctrl + N Opens a new window (this works in Windows too)
Ctrl + Tab Cycle forward to the next tab
Ctrl + Shift + Tab Cycle backward to the previous tab
Ctrl + F4 Closes the current tab.
Ctrl + T Opens a new tab.
Ctrl + Shift + T Opens a recently closed tab.
Alt + F4 Close the entire window (truly universal for every app)
Ctrl + # key (1 to 8) Changes view to the tab number chosen
Ctrl + 9 Changes view to the last tab 

Mouse and Keyboard Combos

Keyboard Shortcut Action
Ctrl + Mousewheel Zoom in our out
Ctrl + 0 Reset to 100% (default) zoom
Mousewheel Press Closes tabs if clicked on a tab, opens links in new tab, scroll
Ctrl + Left Click Open link in a new tab
Shift + Left click Open link in a new window
Shift + Ctrl + Left click Open link in a new background tab

Attribution: Groovy Post

Joke of the Day

A woman was at work when she received a phone call that her small daughter was very sick with a fever.

She left her work and stopped by the pharmacy to get some medication. She got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys in the car.

She didn’t know what to do, so she called home and told the baby sitter what had happened. The baby sitter told her that the fever was getting worse. She said, “You might find a coat hanger and use that to open the door.”

The woman looked around and saw an old rusty coat hanger that had been left on the ground, possibly by someone else who at some time had locked their keys in their car. She looked at the hanger and said, “I don’t know how to use this.” She bowed her head and asked God to send her help.

Within five minutes a beat up old motor cycle pulled up, with a dirty, greasy, bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag on his head.
The woman thought, “Is this what you sent to help me God?” But, she was desperate, so she was also very thankful.

The man got off of his cycle and asked if he could help. She said, “Yes, my daughter is very sick. I stopped to get her some medication and I locked my keys in my car. I must get home to her. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?”

He said, “Sure.” He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was opened. She hugged the man and through her tears she said, “Thank You So Much! You are a very nice man.”

The man replied, “Lady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison today. I was in prison for car theft and have only been out for about an hour.”

The woman hugged the man again and with sobbing tears cried out loud, “Oh, thank you God! You even sent me a Professional!”

Attribution: Pat, Bev

Jummah Jubilee at the DNC

Last week I wrote of the Muslim Jummah event at the Democrat National Convention. You may read it here. Evidently it was fabulous. The attendees received a real education.

Just remember the old ditty, “In 1492, Sharif al-fez bin al abibi, sailed the ocean blue”. Read on. It will make sense.

by:  

The Jummah at the DNC event went off Friday without a hitch, but the Democrat leadership and liberal media are still trying to squirm out of acknowledging that the DNC ever sanctioned the program, which featured a number of Islamist extremists.

Although there is a lot of spin surrounding the event, the fact remains that the leaders of the BIMA (Bureau of Indigenous Muslim Affairs) claim the DNC reached out to them and invited their group to host the two-hour opening event Friday, as well as the officially sanctioned Islamic Regal Dinner that night.

The event appeared on the official Charlotte in 2012 website until it was removed after the radical nature of BIMA got out. The event was attended by hundreds, rather than the 20,000 predicted.

Among the speakers at the event were a retired Muslim Army chaplain who was charged with sedition but not prosecuted, and an unindicted conspirator in the 1993 World Trade Center bombing.

But the issue that really rankles many people is BIMA’s support of theories about the Muslim influence on American history, including the notion that a Muslim crew of explorers sailed up the Mississippi River in the 12th century and established a colony that entitles Muslims to call themselves indigenous Americans.

Real Native Americans are not pleased.

During his remarks at the Jumah event, BIMA spokesman Jibril Hough said not only did Muslims visit America first, but it was a Muslim who led Columbus on his famous voyage of discovery.

The claim is based on a Chinese artifact known as the “Sung Document” that purportedly reports on the voyage of a Muslim crew from T’o-Pan-ti to Mu-Lan-pi, which took 100 days. The main problem with the theory is that no one knows with any certainty where either of those lands is. BIMA claims Mu-Lan-pi is America, but many scholars believe it to be Spain. Also, the document mentions pomegranates being found, but they were not introduced to the Americas until the 18th century by the Spanish.

When Columbus set sail to find the Indies, he had high hopes of reaching Asia, but his travel plan was based on maps by the ancient Greek scientist Ptolemy, who had miscalculated that the Earth was a much smaller circumference than in reality.

(A side note: That famous story about arguments by clerics that Columbus would fall off the edge of the world because it was flat is bunkum, apparently cooked up by Washington Irving and promoted by later atheist writers. Even medieval church scholars were aware of Greek mathematics and knew the world was round. The argument against Columbus’ voyage was that some clerics felt he should have used the calculations by Eratosthenes, who showed the world to be much larger than Ptolemy calculated. Eratosthenes was only off by a couple of hundred miles, so the clergy in this case were correct.)

 

There are other theories, some more likely, some highly improbable, about explorers discovering America before Columbus, including the adventures of the Chinese Admiral Zheng He in 1421 and the Vikings led by Leif Erickson. (Vikings and their dragon boats could account for Aztec legends of blond-haired gods and flying serpents.)

There also may be evidence of Polynesian, Japanese and even Roman presence in ancient America. One of my favorite old stories is about the Irish monk St. Brendan and the Welsh Prince Madoc landing in Mobile Bay, Alabama, in 1170 A.D., a tale that was actually used to press British claims to the East Coast.

BIMA, however, seems to be one of those historical revisionist groups that is trying to write Islam into parts of history where it never existed and exaggerate its influence where it did.

If Muslims truly want credit for the role they played in the opening of America to Europe, then they just need to look at the historic record.

Continued Muslim aggression in the Mideast and southern Mediterranean in the 15th century made trade with Asia via the normal land routes difficult. This inspired people like Prince Henry the Navigator to begin looking for new trade routes that would allow them to circumvent Muslim bandits and pirates.

In 1453, the fall of Constantinople to Muslim aggressors ended the last vestiges of the Roman Empire and blocked major trade routes to India and Asia. In 1492, less than 40 years later, Columbus set sail to find a route to the Indies, during which he literally bumped into the Americas.

If Muslims weren’t historically such a violent people, Columbus might not have ever set sail.

So it’s safe to say that the land of the free is indirectly the result of Muslim barbarity. BIMA and their DNC collaborators can own that.

Do I Need a Stormtrooper License?

It is every Star Wars fan’s dream mode of transport. An American firm has finally made a working ‘hoverbike’.

Made famous by ‘Return of the Jedi,’ where it flew through woods piloted by Stormtroopers, the real life version has been tested in the rather safer surrounding of the Mojave desert.

Created by California firm Aerofex, the vehicle is made from two ducted rotors facing the ground.

Changing the angle of the rotors using two control sticks allows it to move.

A video of the machine being piloted has already become a YouTube hit.

Initial plans to create a hoverbike were thwarted due to a complex control system.

However, Aerofex created a system that responds to a human pilot’s leaning movements and natural sense of balance.

‘Imagine personal flight as intuitive as riding a bike,’ the firm says on its website.

‘Or transporting a small fleet of first-responder craft in the belly of a passenger transport. ‘

The firm also believes it could be used to patrol borders quickly, and say the craft can travel over any terrain.

‘Think of the advantages of patrolling borders without first constructing roads.’

‘Think of it as lowering the threshold of flight, down to the domain of ATV’s (all-terrain vehicles),’ said Mark De Roche, an aerospace engineer and founder of Aerofex.

‘It essentially captures the translations between the two in three axis (pitch, roll and yaw), and activates the aerodynamic controls required to counter the movement — which lines the vehicle back up with the pilot,’ De Roche told InnovationNewsDaily.

‘Since [the pilot’s] balancing movements are instinctive and constant, it plays out quite effortlessly to him.’

However, sadly for Star Wars fans, the firm says it has no plans to sell hoverbikes, instead planning a range of unmanned drones using the technology.

The hovering drones, would use two enclosed rotors.

Aerofex has currently limited human flight testing to a height of 15 feet and speeds of about 30 mph.

The company plans to fly a second version of its vehicle in October, and is also preparing an unmanned drone version for flight testing by the end of 2013.