Three buildings in town were overrun by squirrels—the town hall, the hardware store, and the church. The town hall brought in some cats. But after they tore up all the files, the mayor got rid of the predators, and soon the squirrels were back. read more
My cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bit too quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both of my children had received fire-safety training at school, they did not respond to the alarm. read more
Mary was having an affair during the day while her husband was at work. One day, she was in bed with her boyfriend Ralph, when she heard her husband’s car pull in the driveway. She yelled at Ralph, “Hurry! grab your clothes and jump out the window, my husband is home early!”
Ralph looked out the window and said, “I can’t jump out the window! It’s raining like hell out there.”
Mary cried, “If my husband catches us in here, he will kill both of us!” read more
A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor.
The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered… read more
A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice: ”Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.”
The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. read more
Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around, and returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off. read more
My husband was driving home from work when he was pulled over for not wearing his seat belt.
Two days later – same cop, same ticket. read more
A policeman is on scene at a terrible accident – body parts everywhere.
He is making his notes of where the pieces are and comes across a head. He writes in his notebook: “Head on bullevard.” read more
Here are six Conundrums of Socialism in the United States of America :
1. America is capitalist and greedy – yet half of the population is subsidized.
2. Half of the population is subsidized – yet they think they are victims. read more
