Homey Don’t Wash That

A company behind a new range of Afro style dish washing sponges has been slammed for being racist. I personally think they’re hilarious, but then I’m a racist, apparently.

Campaigners have attacked British makers Paladone for its latest range of dish cleaning products which caricatures black soul legend Diana Ross as having a brillo pad for a hairstyle.

The offending items, which have just gone on sale across the UK, have been lambasted for reinforcing negative stereotypes.

The Unite Against Fascism general secretary Weyman Bennett said: ‘What are we going to have next, toilet brushes like that? This is not appropriate for the 21st century to show images like that. It reinforces negative stereotypes and ideas.”

“Although it’s aimed at being humorous, sometimes it’s not funny”, he added.

“We’ve spent 40 years removing racist imagery out of general politics, removing golly wogs, removing black and white minstrels, and it would be a shame if it crept back in.”

Mr Bennett, who has been campaigning for almost thirty years, warned: “It opens the door for people to produce racial stereotypes and that’s not something we want to see in our society.”

“We’ve worked very hard to make sure that doesn’t happen. That’s can’t be a positive thing in the 21st centry that we are using images that were really invented in periods of slavery and discrimination.”

I wasn’t aware that slaves had afros or frequented discos, but that’s just me. I’m sure Mr. Bennett is better informed than I.

Mr. Bennett aimed a stinging attack directly at the company behind the products and called on them to be take off the supermarket shelves.

Mr Bennett said: “They need to think again. Is there no way they can come up with positive views of people without just using negative views of black people. Trying to compare black people to brillo pads is not a really positive image – it’s not appropriate.’

Paladone said the product had been a phenomenal success since hitting the shelves.
But its attempts to give the humble cleaning implement a funky 70s disco makeover have evidently offended some.

A company spokesman said: “Our range of four washing up sponges are designed to make an everyday chore like washing up more fun. The Disco, Beehive, Punk and Diva have sold hundreds of thousands of pieces. They have been a phenomenal success.”

The products success is, I’m sure, due to the average citizen having a sense of humor rather that sitting around waiting to be offended.

Maybe if they develop a Kurt Cobain Mop head, Mr. Bennett might feel better.

Attribution: Tom Gardner

Joke of the Day

The man who gave up sex for Golf

A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a
couple of strokes. “Boy, I’d give anything to sink this putt,” the golfer
mumbles to himself.

Just then, a stranger walks up beside him and whispers, “Would you
be willing to give up one-fourth of your sex life?”

Thinking the man is crazy and his answer will be meaningless, the
golfer also feels that maybe this is a good omen, so he says, “Sure”,
and sinks the putt.

Two holes later, he mumbles to himself again, “Gee, I sure would
like to get an eagle on this one.”

The same stranger is at his side again and whispers, “Would it be
worth giving up another fourth of your sex life?”

Shrugging, the golfer replies, “Okay.” And he makes an eagle.

On the final hole, the golfer needs another eagle to win.

Without waiting for him to say anything, the stranger quickly moves
to his side and says, “Would winning this match be worth giving up the
rest of your sex life?”

“Definitely,” the golfer replies, and he makes the eagle.

As the golfer is walking to the club house, the stranger walks
alongside him and says, “I haven’t really been fair with you because you don’t
know who I am. I’m Satan, and from this day forward you will have no
sex life.”

“Nice to meet you, “the golfer replies, “I’m Father O’Malley.”

The Groundscraper

For most hotels the key selling point is a room with a view, particularly if it towers over a bustling cityscape or sprawling countryside.

But designers behind this new luxury resort have gone in the completely opposite direction to attract customers – by creating a ‘groundscraper’ hotel built 16 floors beneath the earth’s surface.

The hugely ambitious underground hotel project will see a 19-storey, 380-room structure chiselled out of a giant quarry in Songjiang, near Shanghai.

Designers have set aside a site about 30 miles from the city of Shanghai, in an abandoned quarry at the foot of Tianmashan Mountain.

While towering skyscrapers boast of rooftop restaurants and penthouse luxury, the InterContinental Shimao Shanghai Wonderland’s bottom two floors will include an underwater restaurant, athletic complex for water sports and 10-meter deep aquarium.

Surrounding the unique hotel will be a 428,000 square-meter theme park, complete with room for bungee jumping and rock climbing overlooking the descending 16 floors.

Project developers Shimao Property Group worked with British engineering firm Atkins to design the imaginative hotel, which they hope to complete in late 2014 or early 2015.

It is thought the vast project will cost at least $555 million, with nightly rooms starting at around $320.

Attribution: Mail Online

Joke of the Day

A Groaner

A spokesperson for the U.S. Mint announced that a new fifty-cent piece was being issued to honor two great American patriots.

On one side of the coin would be Teddy Roosevelt and on the other side, Nathan Hale.

Asked why two people were going to be on the same coin, the spokesman replied, “Now, when you toss a coin you can simply call…. ‘Ted’s or Hale’s’.”

Joke of the Day

Two men were out playing golf on a nice Saturday afternoon.

They were getting frustrated, though, because the two women who were playing right in front of them were quite slow, and were holding up the men’s game.

“Don’t they know their supposed to let us play through?!” asked the first man.

The other man shook his head. “I’m going to go ask them if we can play through,” said the first man, emphatically, “Enough is enough!”

He started walking over toward the women, but as he got close, he suddenly turned around and came back, white as a ghost.

“Oh God,” he said to his friend, “This is awful. You’re going to have to ask those women if we can play through. You see, one of them is my wife, and the other is my mistress!”

The other man shrugged, and said “No sweat.”

He walked over toward the women, and just as he was getting close, turned around and came running back to his pal. His eyes wide open, he said – “Small world isn’t it!”

This SUV is not for Everyone

You might not think that there would be much overlap between Lamborghini lovers and SUV drivers.

After all, the flashy sports cars are usually driven by stars and musicians, while rugged off-road vehicles are more the preserve of farmers and outdoorsmen – or, in recent years, suburban soccer moms.

But the two worlds are about to collide, as the luxury Italian firm launches its own four-by-four, for the lumberjack who wants to look smart as he traverses the forest.

The Lamborghini Urus was unveiled at the Beijing Auto Show this week, and it could be coming to a road – or dirt track – near you before too long. Although Lamborghini has not yet revealed the price,  it is expected to hit the market in 2015.

It arguably looks more like a sports car than like the average SUV, with its aerodynamic shape, sleek design and glossy finish. This “crossover” has huge 24-inch wheels and a 600 horsepower engine. Like most of Lamborghini’s cars, the Urus has full-time all-wheel-drive with a focus on on-road performance.

At just 5ft 6in high, the car is also significantly shorter than most other four-wheel drives, making it more attractive to the city-dwellers who provide Lamborghini’s usual customer base.

And its more hi-tech features are a world away from the rural origins of the the SUV, as it is equipped with all sorts of clever gadgetry.

Instead of wing mirrors, it has cameras feeding video to screens positioned next to the driver.

The Urus – named after an extinct ancestor of the cow – is packed with carbon fibre, which is exceptionally strong relative to its weight.

And the car even changes its own shape, with a front spoiler which adjusts its position depending on whether the driver is off-road or speeding down the freeway.

Surprisingly, this is not the first time Lamborghini has tried to launch an SUV.

From 1985 to 1992 they made the LM002, a less fashionable model which did not find success as just 300 were ever sold.

The company is determined that the Urus will be different, and is planning to turn out as many as 3,000 per year.

That would make the SUV Lamborghini’s most popular model – but it remains to be seen whether the firm is ready to shift from boy racers to rednecks.

 Attribution: INAutoNews, Mail Online

Joke of the Day

A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.

The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. “What do you think you’re doing?” asks the wife.

“They’re on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,” he replies.

“Put them back, we can’t afford them,” demands the wife.

So he does and they carry on shopping.

A few aisles further on along, the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.

“What do you think you’re doing?” asks the husband.

“It’s my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,” replies the wife.

Her husband snorts: “So do 24 cans of Budweiser, and it’s only half the price.”

On the PA system: “‘Cleanup on aisle 25. We have a husband down.”